THE CONFLICT CURE
The online relationship repair course based on proven research.
GOT QUESTIONS? ASK AWAY!
I’ve designed a valuable training program that will teach you how to get your partner excited about participating with you. It's called "All Aboard". You can purchase it for a nominal fee at checkout.
However, even if your partner doesn't participate, take comfort that your relationship troubles are not your fault nor your partner’s fault. They are caused by the relationship dynamic you both unconsciously co-create together.
So, don’t be overly concerned about them participating with you. You can singlehandedly turn your relationship around, whether or not they participate. How can I be so sure of this? More than a decade of talking with hundreds of my clients that have proven this fact.
The Conflict Cure is a 7-week home-study relationship repair program backed by scientific research.
It is an online alternative to couples counseling delivered via weekly online training videos and downloadable workbooks.
If you choose the Group Coaching option, you also get four live 60-minute group coaching calls with me (Bruce) so you are guaranteed to get help with your unique situation.
Here’s how it works:
STEP #1: WATCH THE WEEKLY VIDEO TRAINING
Each Saturday you’ll receive access to new set of relationship repair training videos that will teach you communication skills, proven strategies and tools to get you both on the same page. These videos will take approximately 90-minutes per week to watch.
STEP #2: DO THE WEEKLY EXERCISES
Your implementation workbook will guide you step-by-step through a series of powerful exercises and conversations that will get you on the same page.
STEP #3: TALK WITH ME & GET HELP
Finally, every other week we’ll connect for 60 minutes on our live group coaching call. You ask me questions and I provide solutions tailored to your specific relationship situation.
Yes. Once a video module is unlocked, you can go back and watch it as many times as you like for the duration of your course.
Once your course begins, each subsequent video module is unlocked for you on a Saturday morning, but that doesn't mean you have to show up on Saturdays to watch the videos. The video lessons are pre-recorded, so you can watch whenever it suits you best.
Our curriculum consists of 7 modules grounded in the most up-to-date research by the world’s smartest relationship scientists in the fields of:
- Interpersonal neuro-biology,
- Attachment theory,
- Personality theory,
- Developmental psychology, and
- The couple’s therapy with the highest success rate.
I’ve distilled all this research into tools and strategies that are easy to apply with your partner.
You’ll learn proven communication tools and conflict resolution strategies to get you connected and on the same page again.
Here’s a brief overview of what we’ll learn in each module:
- THE CONNECTION MODULE: Re-connect emotionally with each other
- THE COMMUNICATION MODULE: Master the core communication skills for couples
- THE SAFETY MODULE: Feel safe together
- THE NEEDS MODULE: Get your needs met
- THE REPAIR MODULE: Repair old hurt
- THE CONFLICT CURE: Resolve recurring conflict for good
- THE PARTNERSHIP MODULE: How to grow into a team
The full curriculum is available in a lot more detail further up this page.
Here are some of the many symptoms that the coaching program helps with:
- There’s a constant tension between you both…
- You walk on eggshells, tip-toeing around sensitive topics…
- Little arguments escalate into full blown fights…
- You can’t talk about how you’re feeling without communication breaking down or sparking an argument…
- Issues don’t get resolved, and you sweep your problems under the carpet…
- You don’t fight at all (this is the #1 predictor of divorce)…
- Your partner withdraws, goes “numb” or shuts down emotionally…
- Your partner angrily pursues you, leaving you feeling criticized…
- You feel judged, not accepted and like your partner is trying to change you…
- You’re wrestling with trust issues or forgiveness after a betrayal…
- Your sex life has lost its spark (or is non-existent)…
- One of you has said some variation of “I love you, but I’m not in love with you…”
- You can’t count on your partner to have your back and provide emotional support…
- One of you is not fully committed, has left or threatened to leave…
Here’s what you can expect to happen during or after the course:
- You’ll be laughing playfully together, feeling safely and securely connected to one another.
- You’ll have resolved your differences without fighting - instead building a deep bond between you.
- You’ll be using your new communication tools to talk kindly about your feelings, needs and wants without sparking a disconnection.
- Your withdrawn and shut down partner will come out of his/her shell and open up emotionally.
- Your critical, angry partner will soften, listen and offer you the space you need.
- Your old hurts will have healed and trust rebuilt between you.
- Sexual desire naturally returns as the emotional bond between you strengthens.
- As you get on the same page again, you both begin feeling like team mates instead of room mates.
Yes. You can participate in your own time, from anywhere in the world, and turn things around even if you’re the only one trying.
Your partner does not need to participate in order for you to positively impact your relationship.
To paraphrase the anthropologist Margaret Mead, “Never doubt that a thoughtful, committed spouse can change a marriage for the better. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.”
How can that work? Let’s try a thought experiment together:
Imagine you’re having a romantic dinner with your spouse… What would you have to do or say to make the dinner go downhill fast?
Most people can think of at least one thing immediately. In my marriage, all my wife would have to do is make a comment that my driving is bad. That would be enough to change the tone of our relationship in that moment.
See how easily one person can affect a relationship?
In the same way, you can fix your relationship problems even if your partner won’t participate in the program with you or is obstinate. That’s because a relationship is like a see-saw. As you shift so your partner has to shift in response.
As you begin changing the way you respond in your relationship, so the dynamic between you will change and your partner will begin showing up differently.
Very often an obstinate partner will choose to join you in the program as a result of seeing first hand how you’re responding in a more loving, more secure, and emotionally safe way.
Obviously, I’d rather that your partner did participate with you, so I’ve designed a free training program that will teach you how to get your partner excited about participating with you. You’ll get access to it as soon as you register for the Coaching Program.
However, even if they don’t participate, take comfort that your relationship troubles are not your fault or your partner’s fault. They are caused by the relationship dynamic you unconsciously co-create together.
So, don’t worry. You can singlehandedly turn your relationship around, whether or not your partner participates in The Conflict Cure with you. How can I be so sure of this? More than 10 years of talking with hundreds of my clients that have proven this fact.
I've added instructions for solo participants beneath each assignment that requires your partner. You can practice the communication and connection tools with your partner, your close friends and family. It's amazing the difference they make even if you're the only one using them.
In some of the assignments that require you to reflect on a past interaction with your partner, you can reflect on your past relationship(s) in the assignments.
Yes. I regularly witness separated (or broken up) couples get back together during or after The Conflict Cure.
Obviously, you and your partner are human, not robots, so there are no guarantees. In fact, anyone who guarantees that you will reunite with your ex should not be trusted.
However, one thing that I can guarantee is that if you do nothing, nothing will change.
If you sincerely apply what you learn in the program you will massively increase your chances of your ex wanting to come back into your life.
I've added instructions for single participants beneath each assignment that requires a partner. You can practice the communication and connection tools with your close friends and family. It's amazing the difference they make.
In some of the assignments that require you to reflect on a past interaction with your partner, you can reflect on your past relationship(s) instead. It's just as effective.
Don’t believe me. Go try out my free information on this site and then decide for yourself.
The Love At First Fight methodology is based on decades of scientific research by the world’s smartest relationship scientists in the fields of:
- Interpersonal neuro-biology,
- Attachment theory,
- The couple’s therapy with the highest success rate,
- Developmental psychology,
- and Personality theory…
Every technique, skill or strategy you’ll learn has been tested by researchers and by me with the hundreds upon hundreds of couples who have successfully fixed their troubled relationships during the Love At First Fight coaching program.
Unlike a $50 e-book that you’ll probably never read, this program delivers what you need to fix your relationship – education, insight, accountability, mentoring and real support.
Because the program is delivered live and over 7 weeks, it requires you to actually show up consistently to learn, so you’re far more likely to actually fix your relationship struggles.
It works so well because it combines cutting-edge education, with insightful exercises (and personal coaching) to give you solutions tailored to your specific situation.
Over more than a decade, I’ve helped thousands of people across the globe from every walk of life. If you’re willing, I can help you and your partner too.
Absolutely, as long as you purchase the Group Coaching or Private Mentoring options after checking out.
You (along with the other participants in the program) can talk directly with me on the Group Coaching Calls.
You can ask me questions or get help and solutions to your personal relationship problems. I'll coach you or or your partner or both of you, but participation is completely voluntary.
As I’m working with the other couples, you’ll learn even more. This is because much of the coaching I will give other couples will apply directly to your situation too.
We only use our first names on the Group Coaching Calls. The calls are audio, not video. This way, you remain anonymous in the group. Anonymity helps create a safe environment where we can all open up and share vulnerably and do deep work.
Whatever reservations you may have about sharing in a group, trust me on this: the group dynamic is the very reason the coaching program works so well.
The Wall Of Love would not be filled with happy students sharing their stories of love and transformation if the group call format didn’t work.
Again, you are not obliged to speak on any of the Group Coaching calls.
If you purchase the Private Mentoring option, you'll also benefit from a one-on-one 90-minute private call with me.
After purchasing The Conflict Cure (home study) course, you'll have the option to upgrade your order to include four 60-minute Group Coaching Calls with me (Bruce).
You can ask me any question and get personalized solutions to any relationship struggle.
The calls are scheduled every two weeks and each one is recorded, so if you miss a call you can listen to the replay of it.
Also, if you know that you're not going to be able to attend any of the calls, you can submit a written question to me beneath your Call Replay Page, and I'll answer it on the next Group Coaching Call. Then you can listen to my answer on the recording of the call.
I'd guess that at least 50% of the participants don't actually attend all of the live calls. Instead, they post in their questions for me to answer on the live calls and then listen to my answer on the recording in their own time. They still get the value of my coaching and more importantly, their relationship problems get resolved - with or without speaking to me personally.
You can add the Group Coaching upgrade to your order for only $297. To put that in perspective, four hours on the phone with any decent relationship therapist will cost you upwards of $2000. The Group Coaching upgrade is a bargain that I highly recommend you consider taking advantage of.
The Group Coaching Calls happen at 12:00 Pacific Time on Fridays. This call time was chosen to accommodate people from as many different time zones as possible during daylight hours.
Our first Group Coaching Call begins on December 19, 2025.
Because your relationship or marriage is possibly the most foundational aspect of your life… and because a troubled relationship can negatively impact every area of your life, I highly recommend re-scheduling your work and social life to accommodate the 60-minute Group Coaching Calls. It will be worth it.
If you need to speak to your employer to move your lunch break or work hours around to accommodate the calls, do it. Most employers are understanding about relationship issues (because a happier you is a more productive you) and will be flexible if you make a request of them.
Worst case scenario: You can’t attend all the live calls and listen to the recordings while sending me your questions to answer on the Group Coaching Calls. I regularly witness couples transform their marriages without even attending a single call in person.
Yes. Each call is recorded and posted in the private member’s area within a few hours.
If you know you’ll miss a call ahead of time, just email me your question and I’ll answer it (or provide a solution) for you on the call. You can then listen to my answer even if you don’t attend the live call.
We’ve had many couples through our virtual ‘doors’ that fix their relationship struggles never having attended a single live call, but emailing in their questions instead.
The Conflict Cure is designed to fix your relationship problems in 7 weeks or less.
However, many participants report having turned their situation around by week 3 of the program thanks to the communication and connection skills they have learned.
There is no one-size-fits-all time-frame for repairing a relationship. It’s dependent mostly on how willing you are to put into practice what you learn during the program.
I've thoughtfully structured the course so each video module is released weekly.
This approach is designed to give you ample space and time to not only learn the new tools but to also integrate them into your relationship through practice.
It's all about taking those steps together, at a pace that allows for genuine growth and understanding.
There's a certain charm in the way the course unfolds, much like a story, with each chapter building on the last. I know it can be tempting to skip ahead, especially when you're feeling motivated and ready for more. Yet, there's wisdom in the journey itself, in taking the time to truly absorb and apply what you're learning along the way.
The course is more than just a collection of videos; it's a proven pathway that has guided over 10,000 individuals towards happier, more fulfilling relationships. And while it might feel like a bit of a slow dance at times, each step is crafted to bring you closer to the joy and connection you're seeking with your partner.
I want to encourage you to trust the system. There's a reason that it's worked for over a decade by more than 10,000 people.
I'm confident that it will work for you too.
There’s no catch.
The reason I can afford to help you for so little is that we’re working in a group. Over the many years that I’ve run this program, I’ve found that this group program often gets better results than working one-on-one.
I know it seems hard to believe that I’m promising to help you repair your relationship problems for the price of one session with a half-decent couples therapist.
Especially considering that (in cities) they’ll easily charge you $600/session (or more) and advise 12 sessions, which works out to $6600. Not to mention that many couples therapists are not actually trained to work with couples and can do more damage than good.
I’ve lost count of the number of my clients who have told me that they have seen multiple couples therapists and each just made things worse.
I am on a mission to make effective relationship help available and affordable for everyone.
Yes, a full 100% money back guarantee. I stand behind my programs 100%.
If you participate fully and complete the program as designed*and you’re not 100% satisfied that I’ve delivered what I promised, just send me an email within 60 days of your course starting demonstrating that you've completed the coursework and I’ll refund all your money. I’ll even eat the credit-card processing fees and we’ll part as friends. I built this and I take responsibility for it.
All I ask is that you submit your completed coursework to me within 60 days.
Fair enough?
If you’re thinking of purchasing the program just to test-drive it, I’d rather you didn’t join at all. You’re not going to get the extraordinary results you want by dipping your toe in the water, right?
You have to apply yourself. You can do this!
In order to be eligible for our 100% Money Back Guarantee, you must have completed the coursework as designed and met the refund requirements. Please read our terms and conditions for the specifics of the refund requirements for the The Conflict Cure.
I don’t know when I’ll open another intake of The Conflict Cure.
Once the upcoming program begins, I devote all of my attention to my students. When I come up for air, I’ll schedule the next one.
In my experience, the couples who do best, put aside 3 – 4 hours over the weekend to watch the videos and complete the assignments. This way, they have time to practice the tools before the Group Coaching Calls later the following week.
Your time will be divided roughly as follows:
- 90 minutes to watch the Relationship Repair training videos each week.
- 90 minutes to complete the Implementation Workbook assignments each week.
- 60 minutes for the Group Coaching Calls every other week.
If that sounds like a lot of time to commit to, remember that I’m only asking you to do this for 7 weeks.
If after 7 weeks you feel connected to each other, your major conflict is resolved, you trust each other and feel like a team, would it have been worth it to invest this time in your relationship? I'll bet so.
Yes. You can transfer to another program, as long as you let us know in time. Your first transfer is free. Subsequent transfers will incur a $47 fee.
The Conflict Cure Home Study Transfer Requirements:
You can transfer to any program that starts within 8 weeks of the program that you initially purchased, as long as you let us know before the 4th week of your program.
The Conflict Cure Group Coaching Transfer Requirements:
You can transfer to any program that starts within 8 weeks of the program that you initially purchased, as long as you let us know before your first Group Coaching call.
If you'd like to request a transfer, just use our contact form to reach our Customer Happiness team and they'll take care of the transfer for you.
The Implementation Workbooks are digital downloads so you can access them instantly from anywhere in the world and begin fixing your relationship right away.
You can type in the workbooks and save your work inside them.
However, if you like, you can print them out and write on them.
Alternatively, you can read the workbooks on your screen and write your answers to the assignments in your favorite physical notebook.
Yes. We're proud to announce that each video is subtitled into 32 languages.
So, if you or your partner's first language is not English, we've got you covered with:
- English
- Bulgarian Български
- Chinese 中文
- Chinese (Taiwan) 中文 (台灣)
- Czech Čeština
- Danish Dansk
- Dutch Nederlands
- Estonian Eesti
- Finnish Suomi
- French Français
- French (Canada) Français (Canada)
- German Deutsch
- Greek Ελληνικά
- Hungarian Magyar
- Indonesian Bahasa Indonesia
- Italian Italiano
- Japanese 日本語
- Korean 한국어
- Latvian Latviešu
- Lithuanian Lietuvių
- Norwegian Norsk
- Polish Polski
- Portuguese Português
- Romanian Română
- Russian Русский
- Slovak Slovenčina
- Slovenian Slovenščina
- Spanish Español
- Spanish (Latin America) Español (Latinoamérica)
- Swedish Svenska
- Turkish Türkçe
- Ukranian Українська
Yes. The program does account for gender differences, and they don't make as much of a difference as you might think.
We are all human, regardless of gender.
We all have the same basic needs to feel loved, desired, touched, respected, protected, admired, comforted, appreciated, stimulated (etc.) regardless of gender.
John Grey's popular book, Men Are From Mars Women Are From Venus, has promoted the idea that gender plays a bigger role in defining how we relate to each other than it actually does.
In his book, Men are portrayed as withdrawn, needing alone time, emotionally unintelligent and not wanting to talk. Women are portrayed as talkative, insecure, and more driven by emotions.
In my opinion, this perspective doesn't account for the enormous influence that personality type, attachment style, trauma and past experiences play in influencing our traits.
I'm a man who is very in touch with his feelings, loves to talk about relationship issues, and far more emotional than my wife.
According to John Grey, these are "women's traits." Yet, I'm not a woman. Nor am I an overly sensitive man. I'm just a regular human with access to a wide range of traits and emotional experiences.
An area where gender does play a significant role is sex, desire and motherhood.
In The Conflict Cure, you'll learn a far more useful way of looking at your differences than just simple gender distinctions.
That knowledge will be a game changer for you both.
The Conflict Cure is designed and advertised as a 7-week course.
We all have busy lives, and sometimes life delivers unexpected surprises. Therefore, I've included 9 weeks of access to the Video Modules. That's more than enough time to complete the course. You can download and keep your Implementation Workbooks and refer back to them for as long as you like.
However, should you fall behind and need extra time to complete the course, you can always extend your access for a nominal fee. To do that, simply select the Lifetime Access option while checking out.
The 9-week course access is designed as an incentive for you to fully commit, dive deep, and go all out to complete The Conflict Cure.
The reason that I built The Conflict Cure around a 9-week access period is grounded in educational psychology. Research into online course completion shows that the average completion rate of online courses is between 3 and 15 percent! I'm proud to say that the completion rate for The Conflict Cure is more than triple that, in large part because of our 9-week deadline. What I'm even prouder of, are the enormous relationship transformations that participants make in those 9 weeks. 🙂
In my experience, very few people who come through our doors are narcissists in the true sense of the word.
What often looks like narcissism to the untrained eye is usually one partner deeply hurt or in pain, lashing out, or shutting down to protect themselves from further pain.
We, humans, tend to behave selfishly or angrily when we feel unsafe, unseen, unheard, unloved, and unmet. This phenomenon is known as Protest Behavior. It's common in relationships where the couple has struggled to create a safe, secure, and reliable connection between them.
It’s far more likely that this is what is going on, rather than your partner being a narcissist. You probably would have left him long ago if he really was a narcissist, because a relationship with a real narcissist is impossible.
Also, the percentage of people in the population who are narcissists makes the likelihood that your partner is one extremely small.
And, it’s really easy to misdiagnose our partner. Here’s why.
Have you ever felt unwell and then Googled your symptoms on WebMD? You probably discovered that you have contracted AIDS, had cancer and had a rare form of heart disease. It’s terrifying, right?
In the same way, if you ever Google your relationship symptoms, you’ll likely discover that you or your partner is a Narcissist, has Borderline Personality, has ADHD, or has PTSD or any other 4 letter abbreviation.
And, unless a professional diagnosis has been made, you could easily diagnose your partner with something that they don’t actually suffer from - in this case, narcissism.
So, if you suspect that your partner may struggle with narcissism, I want to invite you to let that diagnosis go for now.
Here’s why.
Firstly, unless this diagnosis has been made by a mental health professional qualified to diagnose narcissism, relating to your partner as if they are a narcissist will likely do more harm to your relationship than good. They will feel blamed and judged and begin defending themselves or withdrawing from you.
Secondly, when you begin to see your partner through the lens of narcissism, it’s all too easy to relate to them as broken or to blame them for your relationship issues. This can easily give you a convenient excuse to not work on your part in your relationship struggles. Because if your partner is a narcissist then your relationship problems are not your fault. Your partner is the one with the problem.
Then, you can attribute all of their bad behavior to them being a narcissist and not have to change anything about yourself, nor take responsibility for any of your actions.
Now, I am not saying that your partner is or is not a narcissist. They may be. And if you suspect so, get a professional diagnosis as soon as possible.
I’m just saying that your relationship issues may not be the result of your partner’s supposed narcissism.
When we learn about Attachment and Attachment Styles in the first few weeks of the program, I suspect that you’ll discover a new perspective and explanation for your relationship struggles that makes more sense to you than Narcissism.
If marriage therapy didn’t work for you, you’re not alone. In fact, traditional marriage therapy has the highest failure rate of any therapy in existence – mostly due to the fact that you don’t need to be trained to work with couples to be a marriage therapist. All you need is a license to practice individual therapy.
Working with couples requires a completely different set of skills than working with an individual. And that is one of the big reasons marriage therapy so often fails miserably.
The second reason why approximately 3 in 4 couples who attend marriage therapy report no improvement is because traditional marriage therapy focuses on teaching communication skills.
Couples research clearly shows that poor communication is not the reason your marriage is in trouble.
Poor communication is only a symptom of a greater cause – a lack of emotional safety and emotional connection.
My entire philosophy to relationship repair could be summarized as “Connect first, communicate later”.
During The Conflict Cure, the first thing you’ll learn in Module 1 is how to create emotionally connected moments with your spouse so that you both begin feeling emotionally safe with each other.
Only then will I teach you communication skills.
The reason for our incredibly high success rate with couples in conflict is because our primary focus is on getting the two of you feeling connected and safe.
Once you feel connected and safe, communication tends to take care of itself. Of course, in The Conflict Cure, you’ll get step-by-step processes for resolving the difficult conversations with your partner.
However, many couples report that once they are connected and feeling safe, they don’t need communication skills to resolve their problems.
Sound too simple to be true?
I completely understand if you’re skeptical.
Consider this:
Do you both know how to speak English? Of course you do.
Did you need communication skills to talk to each other when you first fell in love? Of course not. You just talked and it was wonderful.
Why? Because you were emotionally connected and feeling safe with each other.
Here is the final reason I’ll mention for why The Conflict Cure is likely to work for you even if marriage therapy didn’t:
Traditional marriage therapy often doesn’t do a good job of healing old hurt and resentment. You might be told to forgive and forget. You might be given token apologies like “I’m sorry, OK! Can we please move on now??? When are you going to get over this?”
None of these are going to inspire forgiveness in you or your partner and you’ll be stuck with your resentment unable to let go of the betrayal of trust…
And if there is one thing that will sabotage your felt sense of emotional safety, it is resentment.
In The Conflict Cure, you’ll learn a scientifically proven step-by-step method for healing old hurt and dissolving resentment. It’s easier than you might think and won’t take months and months of talking about what happened over and over again.
I hope this helps you understand how my approach is different from marriage therapy. If marriage therapy didn’t work for you (or just made things worse), then The Conflict Cure is for you.
If that still doesn’t convince you, remember that The Conflict Cure comes with a 100% money back guarantee. Try getting your money back from your marriage therapist.
“I’ve spent the cost of my house on therapy over the last few decades and I got further with this short course…” – Sue McKimmie
“This program has made us more competent as a couple in 7 weeks, than one year of couples therapy.” – Linea Ivalo
“Your course is more effective than couples counseling (and less expensive).” – Pam Sorter
Not yet. Here's a true story: The other day I actually got an email from a woman who’d tried using an AI for relationship advice.
She told the AI how frustrated she was with her partner, describing him as selfish, angry, and mean (her words, not mine).
Can you guess what it told her? It told her to leave him because he was “abusive.”
You see, when you type something into an AI, it can’t see the full picture. In my experience, after working with thousands of couples, whenever I first hear from Partner A, it always sounds like Partner B is the problem. Then I talk to Partner B, and it sounds like Partner A is the problem.
And you know what? After hearing both sides, it usually turns out to be… just a misunderstanding.
That’s why, after working with thousands of couples, my personal motto has become: “Anything that isn’t love is just a misunderstanding.” That’s not just a cute phrase; it’s a profound truth.
Back to the AI… If you only tell your subjective side of the story to an AI, the AI will treat it as objective fact and just reinforce your perspective. That’s not the kind of relationship advice you want.
If you want advice that brings you closer, make sure you’re getting it from a human expert or from an AI that’s actually been trained on real couples, real misunderstandings, and real solutions.
Didn't get your question answered? Reach out to us via our contact page.